Just Say No!

To causal sex. I’m finding it utterly annoying that people only want me around for sex it’s like being pretty or attractive and trans that men just want to use me for sex. In a matter of two days I have had people more so three men text me for booty and I’ve told all three guys where to go. I’ve said to all three that sex is so far away from what I’m looking for. That I seek quality instead of quantity and that I’m just looking to date.

I’ve also said to these guys. “If I want sex I can get it, there are enough guys out there who want to sleep with me that I can pick and choose if I so choose too”. Not to brag but it’s true.

The response I get from that is “well if you ever need to “get off” to let them know. But not and till they first apologize and then give me that response. I’ve left my add up on two sites. I’m no longer using any apps I come and go from all of them because it’s the same BS. I most likely won’t be checking my mail on the sites when I’m in California. And just enjoy my Vacation.

Over & Out


Being A Good Friend Of A Trans Person

Things you don’t say or do.

We all have all types of friends of different colors, ages, genders and sexuality but sometimes people over do things or maybe aren’t aware of the things they say or do.

  1. Don’t tell other people about their trans status. It’s not up to you to share that very personal detail with other people. It is up to them to share it if they so choose to, also if they become intimate with that person.
  2. If someone you know asks if your friend is trans but your responce is “It’s non of your business” this implies something is up. Simple response “no there not” and leave it at that.
  3. Don’t bring up trans related things if your friend hasn’t brought it up first. Just because your friend is trans doesn’t mean they want to talk about trans related things every time they hang out with you. Being trans does not define them it’s apart of them just like the Color of your skin is apart of someone else.
  4. Never ask what their previous name was, ask what bathroom they use, ask if they like men or women or any other question you wouldn’t ask anyone else. Respect is key. If you want to receive it then you need to give it. It’s pretty simple. Accept your friend for who they are.
  5. If you have a legit question and would like to ask it in a polite way then do so without coming across rude. But make sure it’s a question you would not mind responding to if you were asked the same thing. Again it comes down to respect.

Those are my top five rules in being a friend of a trans person.






Élisabeth Louise Vigée Le Brun

imageYesterday I went to see the exhibit at The National Gallery Of Canada which just so happens to be in my city. It was $16 for it as well with that you get to see the other pieces of art in the gallery. There were 90 pieces of her art work.

She really had an eye and was extremely talented. I went by myself and though some people took photos and some pieces I’m sure you could take photos of. I chose not to take any of the work it self but more of the building.

I wanted to just experience the art and have it be ingrained in my memory. We’re so caught up to snap photos and stick it on social media that we sometimes forget to just live in the moment and enjoy things for what they are.

imageThe National Gallery Of Canada is a pretty cool building in of its self as well as the art piece sculpture that’s in front of it. Yes that is in fact a huge spider with eggs in the bottom of it.

The long building behind me is really actually beautiful  architecture I think. And the neat thing is when you walk in after you pay you can walk up the ramp that’s on the inside . And the ceiling is pretty cool I’d say.image

As you can see by the photo on the right. The ceiling really is quite beautiful. I only went to the one exhibit I didn’t bother with the rest of the Gallery and after about 45 minutes of looking at art my back was starting to get sore from all the standing. My plan is to go back when I have nothing planned and go earlier in the morning. I went in the afternoon.

I think it’s a great little thing to do when you don’t have much planned but want to do something. And it’s air- conditioned so you can’t beat that lol.

imageAlso the photo with the spider with the taller building has imagealso a very cool ceiling and I had to get a shot of me in it but I also took a shot of it with out me.

Ive always liked unique buildings and architecture. What can I say but I  appreciate different things.

Anyways if you ever make it to Ottawa then you should visit The National Gallery Of Canada and check out their website for more information as well what exhibits are taking place.

The Truth About Permanent Hair Extensions

So if you have been following my blog since last year and or if you’re a new follower to my blog, last year my hair extension quest started to wanting more permanent hair extensions. You see women on Instagram and YouTube and pretty much everywhere women with mermaid long hair.

Clip-in extensions I think only really blend well if you have dark hair but I find it’s harder to blend with lighter hair colors. And though I know my hair is growing at a rapid speed I just wanted to wake up with pretty long down to the boob hair.  Instant gratification.

Did I need to spend the money on such an expensive service NO! But the urge of having long hair was over powering. Now let me just make this clear I suffer from OCD. Things I can’t control bug the life out of me but I am getting better with some things.

Last Tuesday July 5th I made my way toward the salon that I googled as well facebooked I then called from the bus and made an appointment for a  consultation.

At first it was about Great Lengths then I thought about just getting the 11 piece clip-ins. I now wish I just went with the clip-ins but oh no Lana wanted the great lengths. Anyways the stylist and I spoke about great lengths they were cold fusion. I first paid a deposit and then finished paying after it was all said and done.

My hair was washed two times no conditioner. They then blow dry your hair and put zero heat protectant they then flat-iron your hair again no heat protectant. That bothered me but I get it I suppose.

He lightly trimmed my ends saying who ever did it last didn’t make it even and he layered the extensions with my hair. As well layered and thinned out my hair a little.

He then curled my hair with the extensions before sending me on my way.

He told me I couldn’t wash my hair for three days, to stay far away from my coconut oil hair treatments that I do and to not wash my hair for 72 hours so like come Saturday the 9th I could wash it.

I left the salon feeling fabulous and till I got home. The guilt took over and I couldn’t believe I just threw down all that money on hair that was to sit in my head for 3 – 6 months.

imageOnce I was home I wanted to take some snap shots of my super pretty hair.

After the fan blowing and all that fun stuff I then recurled the hair and it curled really easily.

That night though sleeping was extremely uncomfortable the bonds though for the most part were flat I couldn’t sleep all that great. Wednesday came and Wednesday left. Again that sleep was crappy again uncomfortable not only that but having these foreign objects in your head was totally annoying. At least with clip-ins you can remove them. Or a wig for that matter or hair piece you can take it off.

But nope not these they are there and till you go and get them taken out. Or do what I did. Thursday morning I woke annoyed, I took my shower and decided I would wet the extensions and remove the hair spray by washing just the extensions not my roots or the bonds.

I got out of the shower and noticed the pretty wave pattern. But upon air drying and my hair there was a major demarcation line between the end of my hair at the back and the extensions. I was like my hair looks like utter shit. It’s not blending at all and now I’m not even happy WTF.

I sent the salon a message in Facebook saying what happened. I said for the amount of money I spent they should look flawless and they don’t. They told me to call and ask for the stylist who did it and things would get fixed. But I was to embarrassed and didn’t want to be that Client!.

So I went looking on google as well YouTube and such in how to remove them. A lot of the info was that I needed some solution to break down the bonds but then I remember the stylist said to keep away from not just coconut oil but any oil I’m guessing because it breaks down the bonds. I did do a removal bond video on my channel one thing I didn’t mention is that it took me about an hour and a half to remove them also I had half a head of extensions and it was more for length the volume.

I used 100% coconut oil, pliers,two q-tips, hand held mirror and a shit ton of patience oh and in the video I’m watching tv.

Now I’m sure any other women out there might like hot or cold fusion extensions but if you are someone who is anal about foreign objects in their hair or have OCD about certain things permeant hair extensions may not be for you. Sadly this is a very expensive lesson to learn. I’ll stick to cheaper methods of getting long hair instantly by sporting hair pieces or full wigs.

The photos below are after I got those things out of my hair got it washed and then blow dried my hair and hot curl brushed it with heat protectant Thankyou very much lol. Oh no need for a hair trim any time soon thanks!.


8 Questions to Avoid Asking Trans* People

Whenever you meet a trans* individual for the first time it is normal to have questions.  It is normal to be curious about something you do not know.  If you just met them though, then do not ask a…

Source: 8 Questions to Avoid Asking Trans* People

I Have To Be Honest!

I regret getting the extensions. Sleeping last night was extremely uncomfortable again, it was the first night I had them in and once again last night. Having foreign objects in my head is not glamorous. It’s not like a walk in the park it’s far from wearing a wig hell wigs are more than comfortable then these things.

I wet my hair this morning because it was getting yucky with the hair spray and was starting to bother me. Once I towel dried my hair I noticed that the extensions and my hair didn’t look right. It didn’t blend seamlessly like I had hoped and then panic and anxiety kicked in full tilt ahead.

I had messaged the salon on Facebook telling them for the amount of money spent on them they should look flawlessly and they don’t, I said I wasn’t happy and that I’d rather have them taken out. I was told to call and talk to the guy who did them but I didn’t want to be that one nut job who causes shit. Anyways I’m sure they would have charged a fee to remove them but anal me I went looking on Google to see what I could do to remove them my self. I now know why the technician didn’t want me using coconut oil on my hair.

Anyways I removed them my self. Using coconut oil, pliers and a clip or two as well a hand-held mirror and a shit ton of patience. No damage was done to my hair. I do not recommend getting these extensions if you want quick long hair either grow it out or wear a wig or hair piece. And what ever you do don’t go spending money you don’t have to make your self feel better because your down it won’t fix anything!.

Having The Courage To Seek Help


I’ve had my share of depression over the years and have even blogged about it here. I’m sadden to say that it has infact left its ugly mark on me once again. And I decided to do what anyone should do and ask for help. I called my family doctor and I have an appointment to see him on Monday.

I hope to get onto new medication that won’t make me feel like a zombie unlike the last two I had been in years ago. My highs are high and my lows are low. I have had negative thoughts on my well being more often than not. I put on a smile and say all is grand when deep inside my bright light isn’t all that bright. The reality is I’m depressed and I suffer from depression. On top of that I also suffer from anxiety and that’s just the sad reality.

I wish I wasn’t like this and I wish things were different but they are not. And from what I have read when you have had depression yes it can go away after awhile but it can also return. And I know the signs luckily to know that I need help now before things get worse.

Asking for help is the easiest thing a person can do. When I called my doctors office the receptionist asked what it was regarding and I told her I’d like to see my doctor about going on anti depressants. Her tone quickly became calm and we sent up my appointment.

Ive spoke to my parents and told them what will be taking place so they are aware and luckily for me they are extremely supportive which I am so grateful for. I’m extremely lucky to have a support network and supportive friends.

I’ve also come to the conclusion that I have a shopping addiction when it comes to plastic devil cards called credit cards. After yesterday’s trip to the salon to get my hair extensions put in, not so soon after when I got home the excitement of having them and feeling glamorous the feeling of guilt brushed over me and the “What the fuck did you do” came over. It turns out  shopaholics  also suffer from depression as well anxiety seems pretty fitting that I basically fit the bill.

There will be a game plan to deal with that credit card. The first is removing it from my possession if it’s not easily accessible then one can’t use it. The next step after that is to make bigger payments and then when larger payments are completed to then call and have them lower the credit and till I can manage it. Also with that after I come back from my Toronto trip is to go and get a part-time job so I can start really lowing the amount.

I still plan on going to College next year and taking my two-year hairstyling program and working towards getting my licence and becoming a fabulous hairstylist.

Tomorrows a new day!



Positive Thoughts Will Get You Everywhere!

Negative thoughts are easy to think. But positive thoughts are harder to think of. When your someone with a shit ton of issues but don’t want to take medication for them and the only option is to think positively and workout to bring the mood up its harder than some might think.

I’ve spent years in therapy for many different reasons everything from learning to speaking to behaviour and all the above. I’ve been in deep depression before and I suffer from anxiety. I was heavily medicated for a while and till I got sick of feeling like a zombie. By choosing not to be medicated it hasn’t been easy. To wake up everyday and be positive it’s been somewhat difficult but doable.

Diva has helped me immensely. And thank god for her because I don’t know how I would be if she wasn’t here. It’s also come to my attention I have a spending problem with my one and only credit card. And yet some how I’ve been able to hold on to lose change as well not spend every last dime I have in my savings account.

I’ve been collecting lose change from my wallet since last year and yesterday I brought it all to the bank and I had $48 bucks. Pretty cool really, so that went into my savings. I did leave out five dollars in loonies and quarters for the laundry machines. But felt pretty good for being able to save those coins. I’m really not good with having a credit card in my possession. This seems to be very apparent. There’s a reason why I had my mother hold it for me for this very reason. Thankfully I’ll be going to California soon and Toronto and then I’m giving my Mother the card again to hold for me and till its paid up. Because as long as I have it its not safe. It’s to easy to use and when I’m feeling down its easy to swipe. I literally spend like I’m working and then I instantly feel bad after I’ve used it.

And then negative thoughts come into place. I’m sure I’m not alone in how I feel or how I spend my none money. I’m sure this is why people who have spending problems don’t have credit cards. And people who spend when they feel sad or whatever. Money doesn’t make me happy and for the small feeling I get when I buy or spend soon after its replaced with unhappiness and feeling like crap again. Anyways I’ll stop with is post. But yeah feeling positively is header to do.

I know the only person to blame for my spending is me my self & I. Nobody forced me to use the card. I was the only one in charge. I do however blame the credit card companies for giving people credit cards pre approved fully knowing they will get into some kind of debt because spending is so easy to do. Anyways being an adult sometimes totally fucking blows and if you’re a kid stay a kid for as long as possible.

Over & Out