So it takes place every year and every year I don’t go mainly because I don’t feel the need to walk down the street and be like look at me I’m trans. I feel odd doing something like that, I suppose because I’ve never not felt not included with just the regular Pride Parade. I mean my own little view on Pride, it’s self is kinda bent. I say this because my view on the whole community, it’s self isn’t amazing. And this stems from when I was first introduced to the Toronto gay community when I was about 14-15 years of age.
I was told then that it was one big happy family and everyone was so welcoming and awesome and then the cold shock of that’s not how it really was. I was treated, then like a fresh slice of meat 🍖. Even back then living as a gay male who was overtly feminine. Nobody wanted to date me hardly and all I was good for being sex. There actually wasn’t much of a community and I felt most the time like the outcast. Yes, I walked in a few Parades mainly in drag.
I was very much a throwing it in your face type of personality back then. And the more shit I got from people the louder I became. A great deal of the things I did was for shock value and to get any kind of attention.
But once I switched genders, it was to blend into the crowd as much as possible. Even though I was tall standing at 6’2. All I desired to do was blend in with the rest of Society. Which honestly, I do for the most part. I like not standing out. But I also don’t need a March to be proud of who I am.
That being said I’ve been doing a great deal of self growth as of lately. My views on the whole of the alphabetical community is slowly shifting. Last year I skipped the Ottawa Pride Parade mainly being over it. The year before I was on a trans float. This year I travelled to my first Montreal Pride as well walked in it with RBC Bank & My Best Friend. Last night I decided to at last minute walk in the Trans March with a few allies. Though I don’t suppose it needed to be in the evening it was a pretty big turn out of people I was pleasantly surprised with how many trans and such came out.
I frankly didn’t think Ottawa had many trans folks. Which proves just how little I am aware of. When you’re used to your own bubble and circle of friends to then be apart of something like that it’s kinda mind blowing. I was glad I went, but it’s not something I’ll probably do again. Frankly, it’s not really my thing, but I am happy I experienced it.
I didn’t truly like the route they chose, one street was way too far away from the village and they could have picked a closer park to meet at. That’s my personal opinion on the location. As well the speakers went on to long, but overall the walk it’s self was alright. Also one of the people chanting I couldn’t understand half of what they were going on about. But other than that it was a good March.
The conclusion is getting out of your comfort zone. It feels good to experience things even if it’s scary. Nobody said you have to do it more than one time. And yet though my thought process on pride is still bent a little. Hopefully the alphabet community will become less superficially fake before I die and more of a welcoming community for the new generations to come.
Happy Pride 🏳️🌈