Contentment

I used to feel lonely 😭

because I was single

always wanting someone to complete me

I’ve spent years searching online

going on endless dates

Slept with many short falls

having few relationships

that were not the perfect fit

The realization was real

to think I could be alone forever

Then one day I started to love ❤️ myself

whole heartedly

Leaving online

knowing I’ll meet my man

out in the real world 🌎

when the timing is just right

Right now

I’m 😌 content.

Though I still feel lonely at times

I’m human

Contentment

by

Lana Poulson

I’ve Owned It!

I apologized more then once

I said I was sorry

 

You apologized for saying what you said

I accepted it

Your still calling me critical

And judgy at times

And yet I thought we dealt with it

You can dish it out but can’t deal when it’s returned

I owned it!

I’m not apologizing again

This friendship isn’t working

I’m not perfect I owned my shit but I’m done.

 

I Owned It!

By

Lana Poulson

I Hate Being Alone

image

Being alone sucks

always by your self

it’s lonely

😭

Though I have friends

&

Family

It’s still lonely

 

Nobody to hold

to snuggle up to

To walk and talk

holding hands

Togetherness

 

Its fucking lonely

 

Though I have a four-legged friend

shes currently my everything

my family I’m thankful to have in my life as well my friends

 

But it’s just not the same as having someone

close to you that you can touch and hold on too

count on to be there when your blue

hold you’re hand when your down

It’s just not the same

 

They fill you with ❤️ love

a forever feeling

loving you for you

kissing their 👄 lips

a connection like no other

 

I Hate Being Alone

by

Lana Poulson

In A Funky Mood

Not in a great mood,

or a fabulous mood

or a give two shits kinda mood.

I’m in a funky mood

Not in a bad mood

or a mad mood

or a hateful mood

I’m in a funky mood

I’m not in a naughty mood

or a sexy mood

or a sexual mood

I’m in a funky mood

I’m not in a depressed mood

or an irritated mood

or a totally eclipse of the heart mood

I’m in a funky mood

I’m not in a loving mood

or a hug me mood

or a touch me mood

I’m in a funky mood

……

In A Funky Mood

by

Lana Poulson

Sometimes I Hate Being Trans

Sometimes I hate being trans

A lot of the time I hate dating and being trans

I hate having to tell people

I hate having to explain what anatomy I have and don’t have

I hate being judged simply for being my self

Sometimes I hate being trans

….

Sometimes I hate being trans

I hate having a disposition to having depression

I hate having a disposition to anxiety

I hate having learning disabilities

Sometimes I hate being trans

Sometimes I hate being trans

I hate being men’s sexual fantasy

I hate being so self-conscious when out and about that I think people are starring at me because they know.

I hate being used and tossed away like garbage

Sometimes I hate being trans

Sometimes I hate being trans

I hate waking up sometimes to live the next day

I hate looking at the person in the mirror

I hate being me

Sometimes I hate being trans

Sometimes I hate being trans

I hate that I was born this way

I hate that it’s a struggle to be me

I hate that I have so many inner problems

I hate being alone

Sometimes I hate being trans

Sometimes I hate being trans

I hate dating

I hate online dating

I hate how I look sometimes

Sometimes I hate my life

 

Sometimes I hate being trans

by

Lana Poulson